The Light Touch of Allowing: How Letting Go Can Change Everything

Emily Johnson · 2026-10-01

### The Light Touch of Allowing: How Letting Go Can Change Everything What if the key to handling life's curveballs isn't trying harder, but allowing things to be exactly as they are? That's the question Barry Boyce, editor-in-chief of *Mindful* magazine, explores in his thoughtful piece on the practice of allowing. It's a simple idea with profound implications—especially for those of us who work in mindfulness and well-being. We've all been there. You've planned your day down to the minute, and then a flat tire, a sick kid, or a surprise deadline throws everything off. Your first instinct might be to push back, to force things back into place. But what if there's another way? ### What Does "Allowing" Actually Mean? Allowing doesn't mean giving up or being passive. It's not about letting life steamroll you. Instead, it's a gentle, deliberate practice of acknowledging what's happening without immediately trying to fix, change, or resist it. Think of it like this: when you're caught in a sudden downpour, you can fight it—hunching your shoulders, cursing the sky—or you can simply allow yourself to get wet. The rain doesn't care either way. But your experience of it changes entirely. As Boyce points out, allowing is a light touch. It's not heavy-handed surrender. It's more like opening a door and seeing what's on the other side, rather than barricading it shut. ### Why Allowing Matters for Mindful Living Professionals If you teach mindfulness, coach clients, or simply try to live with more awareness, this practice is essential. Here's why: - **It reduces resistance.** Resistance creates tension, both in the body and the mind. Allowing softens that grip. - **It builds resilience.** When you stop fighting every change, you become more adaptable. - **It deepens your teaching.** You can't guide others into allowing if you haven't practiced it yourself. - **It models authenticity.** Clients and students notice when you're at ease with the unexpected. > "Allowing is not about giving up control. It's about recognizing that you never had it in the first place—and finding freedom in that." ### A Simple Practice to Try Today You don't need a meditation cushion or a free hour to practice allowing. You can start right now, in the middle of your busy day. 1. **Pause.** When you notice resistance—a tight chest, a clenched jaw, a mental "no"—just stop for three seconds. 2. **Name it.** Say silently, "I'm resisting this." Naming it creates a tiny bit of space. 3. **Soften.** Imagine your resistance as a fist. Gently uncurl your fingers. You're not approving of the situation; you're just not adding extra suffering. 4. **Breathe.** Take one slow breath in and out. Let the moment be what it is. That's it. No magic, no instant transformation. Just a light touch, repeated over time. ### The Unexpected Gift of Allowing When you stop fighting reality, something surprising happens. You start to see clearly. You notice opportunities you missed while you were busy being upset. You respond instead of react. And slowly, almost imperceptibly, life feels less like a battle and more like a dance. Boyce's message isn't about becoming a doormat. It's about becoming fluid. It's about trusting that you can handle whatever comes—not because you control it, but because you can meet it with openness. So the next time life throws you a curveball, try the light touch. Allow it. See what changes. You might be surprised by how much lighter everything feels. --- *Emily Johnson is a Mindfulness & Well-being Coach and an Ohmag UK Contributor.*